A press release

                                 The Daily Pheesh
                                 saturday 2 October 2151

This is the text of the statement released by the Viva Human Purity(VHP) on the recent incidents in Sector 9* in Area 15091947.

The Viva Human Purity strongly condemns the murder of one of our activists at the hands of members from the Cosmic Human (CH) group. We would like to remind the dear humans of our planet that ever since the first of these dirty worshipers of the "double perpendicular" arrived on our planet in the last decade of the 21st century, there has been no peace for us humans. It must be remembered that we, along with our sister organizations all over the world, had managed to do away with 99% of all impure races by the middle of the last century employing tried and tested methods. Our acts have been driven by the very virtuous motivation of ensuring the triumph of the one-and-only-pure human race on this planet. However the CH, coming from the distant and foreign worlds seek to convert our our humans to their religion which emphasizes the worship of some unknown Cosmic being. All of us also know that these infidels promise our human brothers free trips to space to convert them to CH-ism. We have also seen how these calculating fiends managed to take away the life of our dear brother who was trying to conduct harmless experiments to enhance the purity of our human race. Friends, Brothers, we must wake up to attempts to defile our uniqueness.We must fight back! Down with this comic cosmic-isms we say. The CHs will burn in the fire of our pure anger and will be destroyed by the force of our sheer virtue.

We also request all our brothers to join in the vaporization journey of our beloved deceased brother. We would like to use this occasion to remember his work and perpetrate it further as a mark of respect to him. We urge all participants to maintain restraint. Let the world outside not know the full extent of our technical skill till we are completely ready.-DP




*Orissa is the 9th biggest state in India
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